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The Poor Old Couple

[ Roud 491 ; Master title: The Poor Old Couple ; Ballad Index BGMG821 ; GlosTrad Roud 491 ; Wiltshire 980 , 981 ; trad.]

Fred Hamer: Garners Gay John Morrish: The Folk Handbook. Roy Palmer: Everyman’s Book of English Country Songs Frank Purslow: Marrow Bones James Reeves: The Idiom of the People

Manny Aldous of Great Bricett, Suffolk sang “Cleverly Done,” Said He on the Veteran Tapes cassette Songs Sung in Suffolk Volume 3. This track was also included in 2001 on the Veteran anthology CD Stepping It Out. This track was also included in 2007 on the CD accompanying The Folk Handbook.

Commoner’s Muck sang The Poor Old Couple, in 1975 on the Forest Tracks album Folk Songs From Dorset of songs collected in 1905-07 by the Hammond Brothers. Frank Purslow noted:

Marrow Bones p. 83 from Mrs. Seale in Dorchester Union, December 1906.

Known all over England, it is old enough to have been taken to America, where Sharp discovered it in the Southern Appalachians, taken there originally by 18^th century immigrants from Britain. Although the verse pattern of English versions is consistent, and the tunes related, the details of the story sometimes vary. Occasionally the old man falls out of the tree and dies, after being put to bed with his head tied with a ‘blue ribbon’—an echo of some forgotten magical rite, perhaps? In at least one collected version, the old woman actually pulls the ladder away from under her spouse. Hardly “an old nursery song” as Alfred Williams described it in Folk Songs of the Upper Thames—But anyone reading his severely censored version could hardly be blamed for believing him. The basic situation is, of course, as old as the hills and is to be found in the songs and tales of almost every country in the world.

Nick Dow sang The Poor Old Couple, “a remarkably silly song of extra-marital activities”, in 1978 on his Dingle’s album Burd Margaret.

Pete Harris and Mick Ryan sang The Old Couple in 1996 on their CD The Widow’s Promise. They commented in their liner notes:

This was taken by Pete from a collection of Hampshire folk songs. The story is one which would not be out of place in Chaucer.

Bernie Cherry learned The Poor Old Couple from the singing of Manny Aldous and sang it on his 2013 Musical Traditions anthology With Powder, Shot and Gun.

Paul Downes sang The Old Couple in 2013 on his WildGoose CD The Boatman’s Cure.

Yet another jolly song about female infidelity. How old would they actually have been? In their 40s? Adapted from a version collected by Robert Hammond from Mrs Searle in a Dorchester workhouse in 1906.

Lyrics

Bernie Cherry sings The Poor Old Couple

There was an old couple and they were poor
Artful, artful, dinna all day
They lived in a house with only one door
Oh, what a rum couple were they.

The old man he went out one day
He left the old woman at home for to stay
Oh what a bad woman was she.

The clerk of the parish came passing by
She invited him in with the wink of her eye
Oh what a bad woman was she.

The old man he came home at last
He tried the door and he found it fast
“Oh my poor wife!” cried he.

“It’s I’ve been sick since you’ve been gone
If you’d been in the garden you’d have heard me moan.”
“Oh my poor wife!” cried he.

“There’s one thing you can do for me
That’s fetch me an apple off yonder tree.”
“Oh that will I do!” cried he.

As he was climbing up the tree
She kicked at the ladder and down tumbled he
“That’s cleverly done!” cried he.

As he was climbing up the tree
She opened the door and away ran he
“That’s cleverly done!” cried he.